Well I’m back to blogging daily for better or worse. I didn’t do much before I disappeared and that’s because to be honest things got out of hand. Between work, family, and personal passions I ran out of time. I forget who told me, but I was once told that you have time for anything you want, but you already do everything you want. Which I thought was kind of weird at the time. I sat there and said “Well I want to work out more and do xyz and abc”, I was met with “Okay then what are you doing that you don’t want then?” Recently it started hitting me more.
We all seem to be busy, and busy is good, but busy is for the ants. We are humans and should act as such. We don’t need to compare who’s busiest, we need to compare who’s doing the most of what they want. And it really is that simple. If you don’t have time to do something you want, then you either are doing something you don’t want, or you’re not really wanting to do it. Maybe you’re secretly afraid of doing it well and having to be that person. Maybe you’re afraid of doing it badly, and it’s scaring you, but bottom line is, there is a reason you don’t want to do it or you would have moved something else for it already.
For me the blog is a little like that. I am so awful at writing anything insightful. I feel like an absolute poser/imposter writing. I really do. I wish I could confidently do these things but unfortunately I can’t. I still want to learn to make art, write stories, and make games, but right now I want to progress in my career further so that I can provide for my family. It seems so silly and obvious doesn’t it? It simply means I want to do more for my family than it means I want to be creative. I really wish I was more consistent, so far though, learning Kubernetes for my CKA has been the most consistent thing I’ve been doing. I have 4 certs to get by the end of the year, one is scheduled for 9/7, the next should take about 1 month of study, and then a test in October, the next will likely take until December. I may not get the 4th but it is by far the least important.
All this concludes to say, you. can do what you want, but remember, you’re already doing what you want. If there is something you are truly looking at longingly to add to your life, you will have to move something. Everyone’s life is full… adding something is not possible without removing something else, thus balancing your life. For me, I’m unfortunately giving up a lot of time for a couple months to hopefully be able to show something for it early next year, so please, wish me luck as I wish all of you luck.
Sincerely, your neighbor.